So today is quite the milestone for me, at least as far as normal societal dictum goes because I have officially turned thirty. I have shed the bonds of youth and I suppose I should start taking life far too seriously now. I need to discard my games consoles for crossword puzzles, swap my t-shirts for sensible jumpers, forgo the pleasures of Chinese food and pizza for quaint luncheons in restaurants, swap my Killswitch Engage albums for the sombre tunes of Simon and Garfunkel and mumble and groan at the cost of things as they realistically and understandably increase in value in line with the general economy and inflation. Damned you expensive bars of Snickers and you’re inability to remain at the same cost of my evergreen childhood!!
Well thoroughly and vehemently sod that right off!
There is a sensible, mature adult driving this mind around but he is accompanied by the kid in me, the teenager in me and the silhouette of a man (Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango! – yes I will later, just let me finish this)………sorry, that’s the teenager in me getting distracted and you were thinking it too, weren’t you? A silhouette of the man I will one day become.
I have absolutely no bloody problem with getting older. I remember the person I was when I had just turned twenty and I don’t particularly like him. He wasn’t violent or riddled with criminality, he loved his family and girlfriend and could work his job but he was unfocused and a bit of a presumptuous, opinionated tit every now and then. Now as I turn thirty I am wiser, more considerate, and more thoughtful and my life is generally altogether better for the decisions I have been making in my late twenties. I’m not saying that I am anywhere near perfect as I am now, nor will ever be, but there are definitely some choices, some spur of the moment reactions, that I would love to traverse back in time to have a conversation with myself about. And that would be an odd conversation right there and I am aware that our experiences and our mistakes shape us into the people we eventually become. I know at least one person likes me (thanks dear) so I think I am doing okay!
I believe we are pressured in our society to stay as young as possible at all times. Television sitcoms continuously make tiresome jokes about getting older being problematic. I see famous people, celebrities, in the media not exactly aging gracefully as they desperately try to hang on to their version of youth for fear that maybe they might lose something important to their identity if they even so much as dare to age. There are countless adverts pressuring men and women to look young to feel young and so they make you believe this is what feeling good about yourself actually is. You can be healthy, active, well-adjusted and as social or unsociable as you like no matter what your age is. I will not let others dictate how I feel about myself and I do not think you should either.
With the exception of some people developing physical or psychological problems such as illnesses, disabilities or mental issues, getting older can be a good thing. Just take a minute to remember some of the things you did, some of the things you said, the clothes you wore, maybe a daft haircut or questionable choices in alcohol consumption. Now think about how you are now, I bet a lot of you would agree it is much better now isn’t it? I’m not saying you should regret anything you did necessarily (unless you tried to insert a chili pepper somewhere uncomfortable), but no one ages perfectly. We learn as we go, not just what we like and dislike but generally we learn us, we are our own greatest projects. The older we get, the more complete we are.
So, I will continue to ‘learn me’ as I go but I will not be making any drastic life choices either just because my biological chronometer now reads 30 instead of 29. I haven’t aged an entire year overnight; I am still the same person I was yesterday. I will still continue my gaming habits, still enjoy listening to heavy metal, I will never feel bad about my weakness for Chinese food, I will still remain ever grateful for the presence of my fiancé and my loyal hound Oghren and this morning I punched a fly that landed on my bathroom wall as I was taking my lengthy morning pee! So, there’s that also.
To sum up, please enjoy your new found wisdom as time continues to make (most of) us better people and take care of yourselves, I am off to eat some nummy cake!
Forged From Reverie.